Thursday, April 19, 2012

Remember and reflect...

I have taken another sabbatical from the blog.  To my followers who missed me, thank you.  I missed writing to you.  There were several reasons I stopped blogging and then when those reasons were gone, I decided not to start back until I actually felt like I had something to say.  Today is the day…
On a seemingly very regular April morning in 1995, something crazy happened.  The feeling of security for every Oklahoman was in question as the compassion of every American flooded into our little fly-over state. 
It is just after 9:00 am as I start to write this… the exact time that the federal building in Oklahoma City was bombed 17 years ago today. 
Memorial in Oklahoma City
While I didn’t know anyone in the building at the time, I remember watching the television footage in horror feeling hurt for each of the families who lost their loved ones in that senseless act of terrorism.  While I haven’t always done my best at paying respect to those who deserve it, today I’m in a different frame of mind.  Yesterday I was frustrated for things in my life that weren’t going the way I want them to go.  Today I am so grateful that I have a life and simple things to stress over. 
Looking back over the past 17 years of my life makes it a reality of just what was taken from those people who lost their lives on April 19, 1995, and every other tragic event before or since.  I thought back on every year since then and remembered at least one thing that happened to me that I am grateful for getting to experience… opportunities and experiences that I have taken for granted, yet others beg for or mourn the loss of missing out on… either getting to see their children or grandchildren experience them or, sadly, for some, being taken from this world before getting to actually experience them themselves. 
Today my heart is sad for the things they missed.  Things that are small in this messy world we live in and so many times not even considered blessings, but things that make life worth the trouble.  Here is a list of some of those things in my life…
1995 – Had my first kiss
1996 – Gave my first speech at a public event
1997 – Earned my first varsity letter
1998 – Got my first speeding ticket
1999 – Went to my first prom
2000 – Graduated from High School
2001 – Had my first heartbreak
2002 – Took my first drink of alcohol
2003 – Became an aunt
2004 – Graduated from college
2005 – Bought my first house
2006 – Finished graduate school
2007 – Vacationed in Hawaii
2008 – Started my career at the City
2009 – Met my best friend
2010 – Fell in love
2011 – Adopted my sweet little Lilly
2012 – Get to watch my little sister get married
This list is very small.  But I hope it serves as a reminder that it’s the simple things in life we hold onto the longest.  There are so many things… good and bad… easy and hard… that I am thankful for getting to experience.  So many more then I could ever have time or space to include in a simple list.  Each of them have shaped me into who I am today and I am grateful for their impact in my life.  And I’m thankful that God blessed me with a life long enough to experience them. 
Today I am making the choice to remember those who have had their lives cut too short and to be thankful for the amazing gifts I have been given instead of wishing my life was easier.  I pray that I will continue to be blessed with time and hope that I can make it into something meaningful...

1 comment:

  1. Yay, Sister! I'm glad you're back. Thanks for this post. I needed it :) And I know you know this, but it was April 19, not 17th :)